Just to get this dream on record...
I'm sitting with someone at an outside table of a cafe, facing the street. An airplane -- one of the small, private planes -- makes an emergency landing on the street, crashing into the shop at the end of the street. The shop has a huge fish tank, which explodes water inside the shop, flooding the floor and the sidewalk outside. People --including me -- rush to save the fish. I see tiny fish and huge ones floating away. Somehow I am able to move the water around a dolphin and change its direction so it's moving back toward the store and deeper water.
The good news is that I remembered a dream.
The bad news is that I have no idea what it means right now!
Suzan
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
A Reminder
I was reminded today, as I was talking with Jean, that the place where magic happens is in the space between.
"The space between" is about being open and allowing yourself to experience the clearing/clarity of non-attachment to confusion.
I've been confused about direction. I promised to stay open to possibilities.
Waiting for the magic, wonder and miracles...
Suzan
"The space between" is about being open and allowing yourself to experience the clearing/clarity of non-attachment to confusion.
I've been confused about direction. I promised to stay open to possibilities.
Waiting for the magic, wonder and miracles...
Suzan
Monday, March 25, 2013
Unsure
I started this post on my other blog: 90WabiSabiDays.blogspot.com.
I've been thinking and re-thinking about the direction my life is/has been taking. This has happened each time I've returned from a visit with my friend Mollie. She was my internship supervisor when I was a doctoral student and we've maintained a supportive friendship in the intervening years. This is her second year in West Virginia, working with students at an osteopathic college. And although I still work with some clients through my private practice, I miss the consistent connection with clients. Yet I love teaching.
There's the work with Heal Trauma Fast, which has been tremendously satisfying.
And I love doing art.
There's a part of me that yearns for something new, something different. Some of this I attribute to having grown up in a military family. I have a 3-4 year itch to make big changes. This is an echo of how I grew up -- moving every 2-3 years, with new location, house and need to make friends in each place. It's been both helpful in my work and also something I've struggled with.
This time, it feels different. The DESIRE is different. The urge is different. I have the sense that if I make one choice (stay), I will miss out on opportunities -- a path that will take me in a particular direction. The same for if I make another choice (move), then I miss out on other possibilities -- another path that will take me in a completely different direction. I know it sounds perfectly normal, but I've never had this sense before -- the mutually exclusiveness of the choice point.
So, I've decided to not decide. "I'm open to possibility" is what I've said to a couple of friends.
I'm waiting to figure out what I actually desire.
Then I can find it within myself, maybe.
Unsure,
Suzan
I've been thinking and re-thinking about the direction my life is/has been taking. This has happened each time I've returned from a visit with my friend Mollie. She was my internship supervisor when I was a doctoral student and we've maintained a supportive friendship in the intervening years. This is her second year in West Virginia, working with students at an osteopathic college. And although I still work with some clients through my private practice, I miss the consistent connection with clients. Yet I love teaching.
There's the work with Heal Trauma Fast, which has been tremendously satisfying.
And I love doing art.
There's a part of me that yearns for something new, something different. Some of this I attribute to having grown up in a military family. I have a 3-4 year itch to make big changes. This is an echo of how I grew up -- moving every 2-3 years, with new location, house and need to make friends in each place. It's been both helpful in my work and also something I've struggled with.
This time, it feels different. The DESIRE is different. The urge is different. I have the sense that if I make one choice (stay), I will miss out on opportunities -- a path that will take me in a particular direction. The same for if I make another choice (move), then I miss out on other possibilities -- another path that will take me in a completely different direction. I know it sounds perfectly normal, but I've never had this sense before -- the mutually exclusiveness of the choice point.
So, I've decided to not decide. "I'm open to possibility" is what I've said to a couple of friends.
I'm waiting to figure out what I actually desire.
Then I can find it within myself, maybe.
Unsure,
Suzan
Friday, March 22, 2013
3 Dreams + Insight
Last night, I drove to the western part of my state, to visit my creative friend, Mollie. I arrived a little before midnight to the cabin in the woods and after we talked for a few hours -- the first round of catching up on each others' lives -- I went to sleep. No remembered dreams, though.
When I woke up, it was early still, so I let Emma outside, fed her, then crawled back under the covers. As I was settling in, I thought, "Oh, the reason I haven't remembered a dream for the past few nights is that I forgot to ask." So I asked. And in a 2-hour span, came 3 dreams.
Dream 1
I'm waking up in the cabin. Mollie is still sleeping. I've brought my kitty, Shadow and he greets me. I'm a little worried that he'll figure out a way to escape through the cat door -- he's an indoor cat, so that would be a disaster. Then I realize I forgot his food, so I forage in Mollie's kitchen for some cat food (she has a cat, too, but it isn't there), I find some. Before I give it to Shadow, I realize now that I've totally forgotten his kitty litter box. NOT GOOD, so I start trying to figure out how to rig a litter box.
Dream 2
I'm searching Mollie's house for a bathroom, the one downstairs is occupied, so I walk upstairs. There's a chamber pot behind some chairs her brother and a woman are sitting, talking to each other. They don't notice I'm squatting on the pot. And I don't realize I haven't pulled my pants down until I'm already peeing.
Dream 3
I'm walking around Washington DC. The Russians have installed a new monument that has been the topic of much conversation and head-scratching. The symbol looks vaguely like a bullet with propellers on each side but it's hollow, so if you stand from the Russian side and look through it, the target is the Whitehouse. As I examine the structure of the memorial, I know that it's intended to be used for something more than it seems.
Insight (not about the dreams)
As I drove last night, I listened to CDs from the "Tapping World Summit 2013". The one that's most thought-provoking is David Feinstein talking about the research behind Energy Psychology and meridian tapping. I'm still pondering and working out what makes meridian tapping effective. HOW does it work?
I'm still sorthing through information, but this is what's becoming clear:
Every cell in our bodies is like a battery. Each has a "charge".
Stress degrades the charge and the body's ability to fluidly move the electrical charge.
The more stress, the less the cells are able to communicate easily and effectively.
Organs are affected.
"The meridians ennervate the organs" came from a hypnosis session.
So, if the foundation of meridian tapping is, "The source of all disease is a disruption in the body's energy system," then the intervention is at the energetic/electrical level.
Tapping stimulates the energy to flow appropriately.
When energy/our electrical system is fully functional, then we have more access to the capacity of every cell.
That's all I've got today.
Suzan
When I woke up, it was early still, so I let Emma outside, fed her, then crawled back under the covers. As I was settling in, I thought, "Oh, the reason I haven't remembered a dream for the past few nights is that I forgot to ask." So I asked. And in a 2-hour span, came 3 dreams.
Dream 1
I'm waking up in the cabin. Mollie is still sleeping. I've brought my kitty, Shadow and he greets me. I'm a little worried that he'll figure out a way to escape through the cat door -- he's an indoor cat, so that would be a disaster. Then I realize I forgot his food, so I forage in Mollie's kitchen for some cat food (she has a cat, too, but it isn't there), I find some. Before I give it to Shadow, I realize now that I've totally forgotten his kitty litter box. NOT GOOD, so I start trying to figure out how to rig a litter box.
Dream 2
I'm searching Mollie's house for a bathroom, the one downstairs is occupied, so I walk upstairs. There's a chamber pot behind some chairs her brother and a woman are sitting, talking to each other. They don't notice I'm squatting on the pot. And I don't realize I haven't pulled my pants down until I'm already peeing.
Dream 3
I'm walking around Washington DC. The Russians have installed a new monument that has been the topic of much conversation and head-scratching. The symbol looks vaguely like a bullet with propellers on each side but it's hollow, so if you stand from the Russian side and look through it, the target is the Whitehouse. As I examine the structure of the memorial, I know that it's intended to be used for something more than it seems.
Insight (not about the dreams)
As I drove last night, I listened to CDs from the "Tapping World Summit 2013". The one that's most thought-provoking is David Feinstein talking about the research behind Energy Psychology and meridian tapping. I'm still pondering and working out what makes meridian tapping effective. HOW does it work?
I'm still sorthing through information, but this is what's becoming clear:
Every cell in our bodies is like a battery. Each has a "charge".
Stress degrades the charge and the body's ability to fluidly move the electrical charge.
The more stress, the less the cells are able to communicate easily and effectively.
Organs are affected.
"The meridians ennervate the organs" came from a hypnosis session.
So, if the foundation of meridian tapping is, "The source of all disease is a disruption in the body's energy system," then the intervention is at the energetic/electrical level.
Tapping stimulates the energy to flow appropriately.
When energy/our electrical system is fully functional, then we have more access to the capacity of every cell.
That's all I've got today.
Suzan
Thursday, March 21, 2013
Unfinished
After listening to 2 different webinars yesterday morning, I wondered how many people listen to both neurobiology information as well as metaphysical?!? In the same hour...
Right now, I'm not sure how the two dispirit pieces of information fit together, but I'm open to finding out!
Once again, I'm not able to remember a dream from last night. I'm getting ready to travel to the western part of the state so I can visit a friend. Usually I don't sleep well when I'm away from home, so I'm banking on remembering dreams in the next few days.
What came to me as I was walking Emma this morning was the dream I had with her in it. One of the elements was I was running down a path, calling her. As I called, I played with lengthening the syllables of her name and I laughed (even in the dream) about how it turns out to be a mantra!
Emma.
Eeeeeeemmmmmmmmmmaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh.
How cool is that?!?
From there, I remembered parts of one of the webinars as well as a piece from a hypnosis session from the last few months. There's a process I'm evolving for going deeper into meditation. It's not finished yet, though.
Here are the steps as I've got them now:
Breathe into the heart.
Anchor downward into Earth.
Anchor up into the heart of God.
"Activate the vessel" as a command to the body/mind/spirit
"Activate the rings of harmony" which came from one of the webinars I listened to with featured speaker, Mashhur Anam.
More to come!
Suzan
Right now, I'm not sure how the two dispirit pieces of information fit together, but I'm open to finding out!
Once again, I'm not able to remember a dream from last night. I'm getting ready to travel to the western part of the state so I can visit a friend. Usually I don't sleep well when I'm away from home, so I'm banking on remembering dreams in the next few days.
What came to me as I was walking Emma this morning was the dream I had with her in it. One of the elements was I was running down a path, calling her. As I called, I played with lengthening the syllables of her name and I laughed (even in the dream) about how it turns out to be a mantra!
Emma.
Eeeeeeemmmmmmmmmmaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh.
How cool is that?!?
From there, I remembered parts of one of the webinars as well as a piece from a hypnosis session from the last few months. There's a process I'm evolving for going deeper into meditation. It's not finished yet, though.
Here are the steps as I've got them now:
Breathe into the heart.
Anchor downward into Earth.
Anchor up into the heart of God.
"Activate the vessel" as a command to the body/mind/spirit
"Activate the rings of harmony" which came from one of the webinars I listened to with featured speaker, Mashhur Anam.
More to come!
Suzan
Wednesday, March 20, 2013
Distracted
I knew it before I began, but I couldn't stop myself...
When I walked this morning, I left the house with earphones already firmly secured and blasting motivational music for race-preparation walking. It's not conducive AT ALL to meditating, but once I got started, I just couldn't pull the headset away from my ears.
Although I had a dream, I just don't remember what it was now. The consequences of being distracted.
Emma cooperated to the degree that I was focused. She was eager to GO this morning, but she was also easily distracted by the scents and sounds of our walk.
We stayed in the neighborhood, even though I'd thought I would venture out a few miles.
Eventually, I DID stop the music to notice what was going on. I couldn't get past breathing into my heartspace.
I guess that's ok. It's at least ENOUGH.
Suzan
When I walked this morning, I left the house with earphones already firmly secured and blasting motivational music for race-preparation walking. It's not conducive AT ALL to meditating, but once I got started, I just couldn't pull the headset away from my ears.
Although I had a dream, I just don't remember what it was now. The consequences of being distracted.
Emma cooperated to the degree that I was focused. She was eager to GO this morning, but she was also easily distracted by the scents and sounds of our walk.
We stayed in the neighborhood, even though I'd thought I would venture out a few miles.
Eventually, I DID stop the music to notice what was going on. I couldn't get past breathing into my heartspace.
I guess that's ok. It's at least ENOUGH.
Suzan
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
Dreaming of Dreaming
I woke up last night aware that I had been dreaming of dreaming. It was in relation to my intention to remember my dreams. I laughed and went back to sleep, so I don't remember anything else from the dream.
As I walked this morning, I played with using my breathing to access the entry points of the light behind the heart and the two in the vagus nerve. I breathed into the heart space, then breathed out through the nerve bundle ending. I have a sense that there is at least one more step in this process. Looking forward to discovering it!
Suzan
As I walked this morning, I played with using my breathing to access the entry points of the light behind the heart and the two in the vagus nerve. I breathed into the heart space, then breathed out through the nerve bundle ending. I have a sense that there is at least one more step in this process. Looking forward to discovering it!
Suzan
Monday, March 18, 2013
Intending
In preparing for my walk today, as I clipped the leash to Emma's collar, I squatted and looked her in the eyes. She looked away at first then suddenly we made complete eye contact and she KNEW. She was calmer for a few seconds then as suddenly shifted to eagerness to GO.
The information that dropped in (again -- it came yesterday, too) is that this method is a way for me to be conscious as I connect with the unconscious then go deeper.
I felt the rhythm of my body in motion. An anchor for being in the present at the same time being able to start to journey.
Emma stopped many times. I used these as opportunities to be still myself and connect with the depth.
Then I remembered my dream (or at least a part of it):
I am with a group of people. I'm talking to a younger person ( male?) and letting them know about my current practice. I said I had started three days ago by asking my unconscious for a dream each evening. And each night since then I have had a dream. "It's that easy!" I exclaimed.
Intend or ask for what you want or need. Listen for information (receive) from Source. Then act. It's THAT easy!
"Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes." —C.G. Jung
Suzan
The information that dropped in (again -- it came yesterday, too) is that this method is a way for me to be conscious as I connect with the unconscious then go deeper.
I felt the rhythm of my body in motion. An anchor for being in the present at the same time being able to start to journey.
Emma stopped many times. I used these as opportunities to be still myself and connect with the depth.
Then I remembered my dream (or at least a part of it):
I am with a group of people. I'm talking to a younger person ( male?) and letting them know about my current practice. I said I had started three days ago by asking my unconscious for a dream each evening. And each night since then I have had a dream. "It's that easy!" I exclaimed.
Intend or ask for what you want or need. Listen for information (receive) from Source. Then act. It's THAT easy!
"Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes." —C.G. Jung
Suzan
Sunday, March 17, 2013
On going inward
The focus of this blog is changing. I want a place to track two intentions that is portable. This meets my need because I didn't want to start yet another blog.
This the second day of my renewed intention and deeper efforts toward connecting with my unconscious. One intention is to remember my dreams (this also - for me - means I will write them down). The second is to change my waking and walking routine.
On Friday, in my hypnosis session, I received steps for going deeper, using my habit of walking in the morning. The steps are:
1. Centering as I put the leash on Emma.
This includes focusing on the point of light behind my heart as well as the two points at the base of the vagus nerve, in my gut.
2. Putting my hand on the door handle is my cue to open and step through the threshold - both of the door to my house as well as the one to this deeper level.
3. Allow Emma to be my guide. In the trance, I saw her as a signature of light with the two dancing points of her eyes and her nose and tongue below. She has been waiting for this and is so ready!
4. As I walk, this is grounding my body so I can do this "out of body" work. All I do is notice and make note.
Yesterday morning I started the ritual and went just a short distance because I had the Shamrock 8k and I didn't set my alarm clock properly. Amazingly, I got up with plenty of time to get ready! Emma has been so patient in the days since Max transitioned. She was thrilled to be able to walk.
I walked further this morning. I'm not sure Emma understands the change yet but I think she will soon. She sniffed and peed almost as much as Max used to. The whole point though is to honor my promise to myself.
Today, during the walk, I understood that using the points of light inside is a 2-step process. First focus on the point of light behind the heart. From there, then go deeper through the two points in the gut.
I remember from the trance that these 3 points are access points AND anchor points. In the induction, in my mind's eye, I looked up and saw the three points above me, easy to find and return to.
While I remembering dreaming last night, I don't now know what it was. I hoped to see Max but I am sure it didn't happen last night.
The dream from two nights ago included a former doc student supervisee, Sean, who arrived at my house with a friend of his. Both carried huge clay pieces. Sean's was a beautiful shallow bowl for a birdbath.
His friend gave me a piece that looked like it had started as a shallow bowl, but had collapsed and been folded. I was intrigued by the glazes and the shape. I remember focusing on one area that had bumps and lumps and the glaze was the cobalt blue with a milky sand-colored matte over it. I held the piece at eye level to look at it closely.
Suzan
This the second day of my renewed intention and deeper efforts toward connecting with my unconscious. One intention is to remember my dreams (this also - for me - means I will write them down). The second is to change my waking and walking routine.
On Friday, in my hypnosis session, I received steps for going deeper, using my habit of walking in the morning. The steps are:
1. Centering as I put the leash on Emma.
This includes focusing on the point of light behind my heart as well as the two points at the base of the vagus nerve, in my gut.
2. Putting my hand on the door handle is my cue to open and step through the threshold - both of the door to my house as well as the one to this deeper level.
3. Allow Emma to be my guide. In the trance, I saw her as a signature of light with the two dancing points of her eyes and her nose and tongue below. She has been waiting for this and is so ready!
4. As I walk, this is grounding my body so I can do this "out of body" work. All I do is notice and make note.
Yesterday morning I started the ritual and went just a short distance because I had the Shamrock 8k and I didn't set my alarm clock properly. Amazingly, I got up with plenty of time to get ready! Emma has been so patient in the days since Max transitioned. She was thrilled to be able to walk.
I walked further this morning. I'm not sure Emma understands the change yet but I think she will soon. She sniffed and peed almost as much as Max used to. The whole point though is to honor my promise to myself.
Today, during the walk, I understood that using the points of light inside is a 2-step process. First focus on the point of light behind the heart. From there, then go deeper through the two points in the gut.
I remember from the trance that these 3 points are access points AND anchor points. In the induction, in my mind's eye, I looked up and saw the three points above me, easy to find and return to.
While I remembering dreaming last night, I don't now know what it was. I hoped to see Max but I am sure it didn't happen last night.
The dream from two nights ago included a former doc student supervisee, Sean, who arrived at my house with a friend of his. Both carried huge clay pieces. Sean's was a beautiful shallow bowl for a birdbath.
His friend gave me a piece that looked like it had started as a shallow bowl, but had collapsed and been folded. I was intrigued by the glazes and the shape. I remember focusing on one area that had bumps and lumps and the glaze was the cobalt blue with a milky sand-colored matte over it. I held the piece at eye level to look at it closely.
Suzan
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